this may be the longest blog post ever...

26 days until I return to America. I have come a long way. This has been an enjoyably difficult adventure thus far.

I am greatly emotional these days. My pseudo family leaves on Tuesday morning. I have not said much about them but I will now.

Mama Silv [Silvia]: Such a sweet sweet woman! She is the mother of three kids [two of which are here. From Oklahoma, teacher, just great. She grew up in Nigeria and moved to the states for her senior year of high school. Mom babys us like crazy.

Papa T [Andrew]: Met Mama Silv in Nigeria in secondary school [high school]. Married eight years later. Funny funny man. He leads us in devotions and has very wise words to say. I was introduced to Farkel by him [intriguing game involving dice]. Very protective.

Katie: Niece of Mom and Dad. Lives in Texas. Love this girl, very similar to me, just a funny girl. My age.

Alex: Sweetest soul I have met in a long time. She always has an encouraging word to say. Daughter to mom and dad, 21, and very intelligent. Alex has a vision impairment and often jokes about being the blind girl. I love her to death.

Marissa: Sister to Alex, daughter of mom and dad. She is the baby of our group. Senior in HS [I am trying to get her to go to Point Loma]. She wants to be a nurse and will make a great one.

Uncle Jon: Unrelated to previously mentioned individuals. He has been doing trauma counseling for COTN for a few summers now. This man has a serious gift. He can get these kids to trust him in a second. He is also an amazing guitarist and vocalist. Dry humor. 29, Bay Area, good man.

Aunt Jerusha: Cousin of Jon. Just received her Masters in Literature from Loyola. This woman has more insight into the human race than anyone I have ever met. I have learned so many things from her. It has been so great having her. Always ready to listen, always ready to love.

Lira Medical Clinic: I am the type of person who just wants to fix things [save the world, I get this from my mom]. I am always go-go-go. Sitting around in the midst of so much need drives me crazy. I see such easy solutions because medically life is so easy in America. My whole life my health has been easily maintatined. Things that one apsirin can fix kill people here. So what is this initial impulse? Drop IBprofin on Uganda like rain! Life is not this easy. Malaria is a constant plague. HIV is an epidemic. Disentary is normal. Big bellies and sunken cheeks are expected. Health care has improved to say the least. I was impressed with the hospital. Much better than the ones I experienced in Malawi. To paint a mental picture: 5 different wards [long brick buildings with tin roofs]. Metal beds with think mattresses, no curtains, 20 to a ward, crying, laughing, wailing, praying. As a patient you bring your own nurses. The doctors are there for injections and surgeries. Families sleep on the grass as their loved one improves or retreats into greater illness. The hospital grounds turn into a village. People cook, clean, do laundry, and sleep wherever there is room. Patients may wait outside for days before being seen. I saw many curled in pain, praying for strength [we joined them in prayer].

We visit the maternity ward first. There are pregnant ladies crowding the room. There are new mothers and new babies [who look dark purple]. There are women in pain, women being held down by their families as they come out of anesthesia, women who are joyful, and women who are broken. We prayed for these women according to their needs. Many had hugely swollen bellies from c-sections. We prayed for healthy babies and healthy mothers. I came to a woman who looked very upset. She did not have her baby with her and her stomach was flat. Her baby died. I had no idea what to do, so I had papa T pray. We were both at a loss for words. I felt compelled to stay. I just watched her as she cried. Really, I have never been in any situation close to this, not a word to say so I drew pictures on her sheet with my finger and she just watched.

The NICU was full of malarial infected babies with needles sticking out of their heads, waiting for their next injection. I felt much more hope here. There was a little boy who I nearly knocked over so I knelt down to apologize and noticed he was shaking. Sickle cell anemia. I HATE seeing children suffer.

The ICU put a hole in my heart. 20 beds full of malnourished, bedridden, infected, diseased, children [dying]. I saw a five year old girl trapped in an 8 month old body. Skin and bones [more bone than skin]. UNICEF and World Hunger supply food to improve these conditions but these kids need years of perfectly controlled diets to make any lasting change. Many of them have AIDS, TB, Malaria, or diarrhea alongside malnutrition which rapidly eats at their flesh. Praying for them felt extremely strange. I am not sure if there is a point in life where you just ask God to take his children away from this pain, but if there is, the kids in this ward are ready to go. I wanted to save their world, build a home, fly my mom out, and get these kids well. Impossible. I guess in some cases holding a hand and saying a few words is a substitute for those life changing medicines, those cure-all pills, those quick surgeries done by only the best. Be thankful for American health care, we’ve got it made. I’d say this system may improve in 30 years [there is a God]. Life is sad, but it is worth living for. If everyone does something here and there to better humanity, things will come together and someone will live because of something you’ve done.

Ward five is a death sentence. 70 pound grown men [lay in agony, waiting to die]. Not even enough strength to open their eyes. HIV has conquered. Malaria has put their body into shock. Dying seems like the cure in these circumstances.

Nursing? Mom, I admire your skills, I think I will join in your profession one day.

Barlonyo: former IDP camp located about thirty minutes from our home. Most of our kids are from there and kids still live there that are on the waitlist for the new COTN village. In 2004 the LRA massacred this camp. Killed everyone in sight. Burned as many huts as possible. Put 500+ people in the ground. IDP camps are government run but there were not enough protective personnel. This was holy ground to me. One of my girls from COTN watched her mother die on that day. She saw the bullet end her life and the rebels light her hut on fire. She herself suffered a shot to the hand and burning on her left arm and face. Scars remind her every day of trauma. Burn marks made her beautiful. There is now a memorial set up in the middle of the village. We all thought this place was going to break out hearts, leave us with tears in our eyes, but there was a lot of peace. The memorial [mass grave] is U-shaped. The boys played soccer in the middle and the girls jumped rope on the sides.

Safari: Murchison Falls. Gorgeous [google it]. I went down the NILE RIVER!! Honestly, I did not know the Nile went through Uganda and guess what, it starts in Uganda! Oh the joys of American geography [needs serious revision]. We left Lira at around 6 am for our 4 hour journey to Murchison. We got on a boat and rode up the Nile to the falls. I fell asleep on the boat and woke up to the sound of pounding water. Utterly amazing. I wanted to sit on a rock and stare at it for hours [if only this world was still free to roam]. We stayed in a “hut” which only looked like one from the outside. Our room was lit at night by lightening and I woke up several times to rain drops against our tin roof. We began our land safari bright and early. I can’t wait to post photographs when I return home. We saw a lioness, monkeys, baboons[we had our door open one of these sneaky guys jumped into our car while we were still in it and stole two loaves of bread] , all kinds of deer type animals [too many Ugandan names to remember, my favorite was the cob], many giraffes, elephants, and different types of birds [all BEAUTIFUL]. It was such an amazing day.

I hope you read all of this, if not, do it, you will love it. I enjoy sharing my experiences with all of you. I am going to try very hard to blog at least every other day.

Obanga ber [God is good]

Omari [You are loved]

Jen